Love Island star Malin Andersson has shared a heartbreaking and honest message about how she is feeling ahead of the birth of her second child.
She confessed she worries her unborn baby won’t survive following the death of her daughter Consy in 2019, just four weeks after she was born.
Malin opened up about her fears that her pregnancy is ‘too good to be true’ and constantly reminds herself she is going to be a mum again.
The mum-to-be is undergoing therapy to deal with ‘unresolved feelings and pain’ from losing Consy and told her followers to ‘believe in your time’.
On Thursday she shared an image of herself looking relaxed wearing a tan-coloured body suit, with one hand gently resting on her growing baby bump.
‘It feels like I’ve been here with you before. I have. I’ll be honest, 3 years ago feels like a blur to me.. but feeling a new human growing inside me again feels so familiar. It scares me,’ Malin began.
‘So I’m here to welcome you on my journey with my rainbow baby. I know that sharing how I feel resonates.. and I want those that are struggling to conceive, or have lost a baby and are trying, pregnant with their rainbow baby or feel like their happy ending hasn’t come yet – to see a clearer view through my life. And that actually we must trust the timing in everything.
‘I haven’t spoken to you much yet on how I’ve felt.. to be honest it’s been a very weird journey so far. I was hesitant to even reveal my pregnancy. I have this inner hurt, this pain & that voice in my head that tells me this isn’t real…that my child won’t survive – that something bad will happen.
‘I’ve been very quiet – Malin quiet? That’s strange – the queen of positive thinking.. waking up each day with not much to say. Just hope in her heart that baby will make it another day.’
Remembering Consy she continued: ‘See the reality is, we never really know what life can throw at us – we must remain present & mindful.. appreciate every minute. For sure I hope for the best, but I can’t help past trauma creep up on me.
‘She’s integrated in me. Consy lives through me each day. I see her brown eyes open one last time…and it gives me fear…fear of the unknown. So what do I do?
‘I’ve been going to therapy; remaining consistent. This has brought up a whole lot of unresolved feelings & pain that I seemed to have blocked out.. don’t get me wrong I have the most amount of love and joy in my heart – but as I said.. I’m only human. We tend to always think the worst.
‘When I realise what’s growing inside me, I get goosebumps, I have to have a double take. Isn’t it sad that sometimes things seem too good to be true? Well maybe, just maybe they aren’t. I keep telling myself that this is my time..And for f**kin’ sure – it is.
‘Believe in your time. I’m here to tell you that your ending is only your beginning. Ma.’
Malin revealed her pregnancy earlier this month with a picture of her and her partner joining hands in a heart shape over her bump. She did not reveal the dad’s identity.
She wrote on social media: ‘My heart feels electric writing this, my eyes tearing up.. because I can promise you all there was once upon a time I never thought I could experience this. I was wrong. It just wasn’t the right time. All the pain I’ve endured has led to this very moment.. my own little family.’
Sands UK charity
Sands UK is a stillbirth and neonatal death charity, which works to reduce the number of babies dying and to ensure that those affected by the loss of a baby receives the best possible care for as long as they need it.
The charity aims to better understand the causes of baby deaths and works with governments and other organisations to raise awareness of issues surrounding baby loss.
Sands provides bereavement support at a local and national level.
Please visit the Sands UK website for more information and contact details.
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