The first of 2020’s head-to-head presidential candidate debates took place on Tuesday evening – US time – and the jury is out on the result, with both camps claiming a win, as expected, although snap polls put the challenger ahead at 48% to 41%.
Clearly, Joe Biden didn’t take this advice.
Overheard: At the debate Tuesday Biden should start every response by looking at Chris Wallace and say, “Well that’s the 750 dollar question, isn’t it?”
— George Takei (@GeorgeTakei) September 29, 2020
Biden was, like, my 17th choice in the primaries but I’ll admit I hope he drops some weird folksy shit on Trump tomorrow.
“Get a load of this tomato. Tell you what, Jack, flippin’ nickels might cut the mustard over at your pappy’s juke joint but this is the big leagues, get me?”
— Abe “Abe Goldfarb” Goldfarb (@AbeGoldfarb) September 29, 2020
At the debate Biden should drop $750 on Trump’s podium and say “next year’s on me, chief.”
— Sean Thomason (@TheThomason) September 27, 2020
However, even before the event, the Trump team were pre-emptively making excuses for a good Biden performance with rumours that:
Biden is on drugs and should take a test
He had been shown the questions ahead of time
Answers would be fed to him via an earpiece
This was a Biden spokesperson’s response to the idea of submitting to a drugs test.
“If the president thinks his best case is made in urine he can have at it. We’d expect nothing less from Donald Trump, who pissed away the chance to protect the lives of 200K Americans when he didn't make a plan to stop COVID-19.”
— @KBeds https://t.co/Fx2gypdVZr
— TJ Ducklo (@TDucklo) September 27, 2020
His Twitter account, no doubt run by a comms team, tweeted this mic drop moment.
It’s debate night, so I’ve got my earpiece and performance enhancers ready. pic.twitter.com/EhOiWdjh1b
— Joe Biden (@JoeBiden) September 29, 2020
While pro-Trump tweeters spread rumours about Biden’s refusal to have his urine or ears scrutinised, others joined in with these rather more tongue in cheek suggestions.
1.
SCOOP: Biden camp denies Trump campaign request to cut him open and see if he is cake
— David Freedlander (@freedlander) September 29, 2020
2.
Why won't Joe Biden allow a cardiologist to attach electrodes to his chest during the debate so that the American people know he's alive?
— Yashar Ali
(@yashar) September 29, 2020
3.
Joe Biden REFUSES to deny that he is an IBM supercomputer sealed inside of a Japanese human suit
— Dave Weigel (@daveweigel) September 29, 2020
4.
BREAKING NEWS: Joe Biden REFUSES to take Voight-Kampff test before debate! Donate $45 NOW if you think Biden is a replicant!
— Dave Weigel (@daveweigel) September 29, 2020
5.
I’m not saying this is why Biden is refusing to have his ears checked before debate, but… pic.twitter.com/cgDM3yw4Hu
— Dave Rubin (@RubinReport) September 29, 2020
6.
The ear piece conspiracy is truly absurd.
Everyone knows the truth: Biden’s handlers implanted a Soros-funded microchip that allows Antifa to control his voice.
My sources on this are unimpeachable.
— Jon Favreau (@jonfavs) September 29, 2020
7.
I HEAR FOX NEWS IS GIVING BIDEN THE DEBATE QUESTIONS AHEAD OF TIME AND BIDEN WILL BE WEARING AN EARPIECE AND BILL GATES IMPLANTED A COMPUTER CHIP IN HIS HEAD TO MAKE HIM NOT-SENILE AND THE DEMS HAVE A CHUPACABRA HIDDEN UNDER THE STAGE AND WILL USE IT TO ATTACK TRUMP AND THEN…
— Rex Huppke (@RexHuppke) September 29, 2020
8.
The Biden campaign has cleverly agreed to no handshake tonight so that they can deploy their Biden hologram for the debate. Chris Wallace must swing a 2×4 through Biden to make sure he is real. How would we know otherwise?
— Michael McDonald (@ElectProject) September 29, 2020
9.
Has Joe Biden committed to a pre debate skin test where a Fox anchor gets to pull on his face to confirm that it is not @RonaldKlain in a Scooby-Doo style villain costume?
— Tim Miller (@Timodc) September 29, 2020
10.
joe biden must allow a neutral third party to check if he's wearing that shoe that is also a phone from get smart
— Josh Billinson (@jbillinson) September 29, 2020
11.
Biden's going to wear an earpiece, but it'll just be playing the song Runaround Sue on a loop, so I'm not really sure what the fuss is about.
— Osita Nwanevu (@OsitaNwanevu) September 29, 2020
NEWSNOTES had this response to the earpiece accusation.
Trump said he wants Biden’s ears checked for electronic devices.
I want Trump’s ears checked to see if there is anything between them.
— NEWSNOTES
(@ReportsDaNews) September 29, 2020
Something to think about.
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Whatever happens in the election, Joe Biden wins the prize for the best campaign ad
Source Twitter Image Screengrab
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